We have recently asked several moms what’s the worst things people have said to them while they were pregnant, and we received some pretty unbelievable replies. Here are some of them and in case you need a bit of help, the reason why you should never ever say such to a hormonal, pregnant woman:
1. “Sinabi ng tita ko sa pinsan ko na 3-years old na saksakin ang tiyan ko para mamatay na baby ko. Joke lang daw pero hindi maganda dating sa akin.”
Threatening a pregnant woman and her unborn baby bodily harm is NOT OKAY. Even in jest, there’s nothing humorous about it.
2. “Hindi daw ako mukhang buntis kasi same pa rin naman daw laki ko.”
“Buntis ka pala? Akala ko malaki lang bilbil mo.”
Thanks, but first, we already know our size, so no need to point that out. And in case you didn’t know, commenting on a woman’s size, especially a pregnant one is a NO NO.
3. “Ang pangit mo na!”
“Naku halatang buntis na si Janelle, hindi na maganda.”
“Brownout daw kasi and itim ng kili-kili ko.”
“Hala anong nangyari sa mukha mo? Puro tigyawat! Lalaki iyan.”
“Anong nangyari sa iyo, Nica? Hindi na kita nakilala, ang pangit mo magbuntis!”
Just because we’re pregnant does not mean anyone can say bad things about our looks. And no, you can’t accurately predict our baby’s gender based on how bad you think we look.
4. “Buntis ka na naman?!?!”
“Buntis ka na naman? Buti hindi ka minumura ng mga anak mo, dami mo nang anak tama na.”
“Buntis ka pala ulit. Last niyo na iyan. Tama na.”
In the same way that no one has the right to tell us how bad we look, no one can also question our pregnancy, nor tell us to stop. It’s our family, our decision.
5. “Buntis ka pala? At malapit ka na manganak sa lagay na iyan?”
“Hala ang payat mo! Baka malnourished baby mo!”
“Hindi siguro nakukuha ng baby iyung tamang nutrients kaya maliit tiyan mo, ano?”
Telling us that our tummy is “too small” can make us worry needlessly about our child’s health. No pregnancy is the same, and no one can say if a mother is “malaki” or “maliit,” unless perhaps you’re her OB.
6. “Buntis ka na-naman? Nakunan ka lang last time ah!”
“Ingatan mo iyan ha!” – My first baby was a stillborn.
“Ayan, siguro makaka-move on ka na” – When I got pregnant after I gave birth to my second child, a stillborn.
Just no. Please.
7. “Paano niyo bubuhayin ang tatlo?!?!”
Unless you plan to contribute to our daily budget, how we manage our family’s finances is none of your business.
8. “Are you sure anak ni E— iyan?
Ok, babies can look differently after how many days or months, so please, don’t make intriga where there is none.
9. “Hindi ka naman buntis. Mataba ka lang.” – What I got when I tried to line up at the priority lane.
“Buntis ka ba? Parang naka-inom ka lang.” – When I tried to park at a priority space.
When someone says they’re pregnant, they are.
10. “Talo ka ni —-, quota na siya, babae at lalaki. Iyang pinagbubuntis mo, babae naman.”
No, this is not a competition.
11. “Kung malalaglag iyan, malalaglag talaga.”
We pray for our baby’s health the moment we get pregnant, so we don’t really appreciate when someone predicts a miscarriage for us.
12. “Huwag mong i-reason ang pagiging buntis mo.”
“Napaka-arte mo! Buntis ka lang, hindi ka lumpo!”
In case some people don’t get it, not all pregnancies are easy. And since pregnancies involve the life of both mother and child, us moms will do whatever it takes to maintain our health (both ours’ and our child’s), and it’s not just because we’re maarte or pa-importante. So yes, until we give birth, we will take our unborn child into primary consideration, always.
13. “Nako! Maitim at pangit iyang anak mo!” – just because my husband is dark-skinned.
Yes, judging a child – an unborn one at that is a great idea.
14. “Ilabas mo na nga iyan!” – my boss to me because we were busy at work and I had a sensitive pregnancy.
Please don’t let us feel that our pregnancy is unwanted in any way. Because that’s just insensitive.
15. “Mabubuhay sa kasalanang ang anak mo dahil hindi ka kasal.”
Again, please stop judging an unborn child.
And this one:
During my baby shower while I was 8 months pregnant:
“Girls! Ganito ah! Ganito ang mukha (pointing at my face) ng malapit na manganak!”
Err no, pregnant women are not clowns you can make and poke fun of at parties – especially at an event supposedly honoring us.
Clueless on what to say to a pregnant woman? Four simple words: “Congratulations! You look great!”
Of course, well wishes such as “have a healthy pregnancy,” or “praying for a smooth delivery” are welcome too.