By: Anna Katrina J. Bolivar
It is fun to be a firstborn child! You get to enjoy the undivided attention of mommy and daddy. With still just one kid, family time is always about the firstborn. But what happens when a new baby arrives? How would the firstborn adjust to the reduced attention that he/she would get once the new baby arrives?
A few celebrity mothers recently gave birth to their second babies. On the photos that they publicly shared via Instagram, it would seem that their first-born is adjusting really well with the arrival of the new baby of the family. But how did they prepare their first-born about the coming of their sibling? How did the parents help the new ates and kuyas adjust to the somewhat reduced attention from mommy and daddy?
Zion and Kai: Kids of Sarah Lahbati and Richard Gutierrez
Sarah Lahbati gave birth to her second child with Richard Gutierrez last March 2018. The photos below feature the two curly babies – Kuya Zion and little Kai. Sarah considers them her biggest blessing and greatest joy.
Primo and Leon: Kids of Iya Villania-Arellano and Drew Arellano
The fit and sporty mommy, Iya Villania-Arellano gave birth to her second child with Drew Arellano last August 2018. The heart-melting smile of Primo remains even if Leon now shares with mom’s attention.
Pele and Vika: Kids of Jolina Magdangal-Escueta and Mark Escueta
Jolina consistently shares their sweet family moments on Instagram. With the photos of these two adorable kids, it seems that the new kuya is having so much fun with his new baby sister.
Feather and Freedom: Kids of Isabel Oli-Prats and John Prats
After the long wait for baby number two, Freedom Prats finally made an appearance. Although there are limited photos of their kids in social media, this particular photo shows how much the new ate adores her little brother.
Lucia and Carmen: Kids of Bianca Gonzalez-Intal and JC Intal
Bianca has been sharing her experiences on how their family is adjusting to having a newborn. In her recent Instagram story, she shared how the two kids had a hard time going to bed that she and JC, with one kid each, were “so pagod” after. Nonetheless, we bet that pagod was nothing when you see your two kids getting along really well.
The very issue that parents worry about with the coming of their second baby is the jealousy from their firstborn. The parents may think that it’s not necessary but such emotion is very valid for the firstborn to feel. Imagine being the apple of your parents’ eye then suddenly becoming a second priority.
There may be times that the firstborn would be jealous because of the attention that the parents will be giving to the new baby. The needs of the firstborn may not be immediately addressed because the new baby also needs attention. Being a newborn and very dependent, the parents would logically attend to the newborn’s need. Hence, the firstborn feel like a second priority.
There may be no definite and exact way to help your first child adjust with the arrival of a second baby. As with anyone, it would help lessen the jealousy when you talk to your first born during the pregnancy and walk him through the possible scenarios that might happen when his new sibling arrives.
It would also be helpful to always keep the love tank of the firstborn full and continuously ensure him that he is not loved less now than before. Allow him to be involved in taking care of the new baby so he won’t feel left out. Ask for opinions for some things so he would still feel important. He may have a hard time adjusting at first, but he will eventually get the hang of it and enjoy his journey with the new sibling.
Parents, hang on as well! Taking care of two kids is not easy, but as with your first born, you’ll get the hang of it. Everyone in the family, not just the firstborn, needs to process things and understand that there will be a lot of changes in the family rhythm once the new baby arrives. It might be difficult but nothing can be more joyful than seeing your kids together.
Anna Katrina Bolivar is a first-time mom to a baby girl. She’s a stay-at-home, breastfeeding, cloth diapering, and cosleeping mom. She has her own blog at The Everyday Nanay. Despite all the challenges of a stay-at-home mom, she always goes to sleep with a heart that is overflowing with love for the Lord, her husband, and their precious little girl.