Healthy Peer Interactions

Researches have proven that children with positive relationships with their parents have a higher tendency to maintain healthy relationships with peers as well. Sound social development in short starts at home.

As parents, you would do well to be sensitive of your child’s social needs. Give your kids ample opportunities to play with children of the same age. Peer groups can offer exciting play moments.  You can gather a group of kids with whom your child will play for at least once a week. This system will also provide stability to your child’s peer relationships, allowing the peer group participants to get to know one another well and enjoy each other’s company. Children who play with the same peer group over time would develop sophisticated social skills as they learn each other’s personalities.

It’s important to remember, however, that children develop at their own rate and pace. One child may feel comfortable to simply jump right in and initiate play with others, but another child may want to stand back and let the play develop first before joining in. Either way, children should be allowed to join when they see fit. Social interaction should come naturally in each child.

As a parent, you are your child’s first play partner. Take advantage of these times to develop their social skills. Play with your kids in the way a peer would—get down on the floor, laugh, and smile with them. Respond positively to their ideas and avoid being overly directive in the play setting. This sensitivity will help them enjoy longer playtime with others.

When my daughter was younger, she loved to play house. I would play along with her and we would both be mommies to our baby dolls. My daughter knew that babies cry when they are hungry, so she would make crying noises. I would then hurry to get the baby a feeding bottle, and my daughter would follow by rocking the baby to sleep. The “mommies” would feel hungry too, so she would tell me to cook some dinner for both of us. Our conversations revolved around what we wanted to eat and how we could get the babies to sleep so we could have our dinner. Sometimes, my daughter would drop a pot to the floor and pretend to wake the sleeping baby! I would quickly have to get my baby-crying voice out and spring into action! My daughter would roar with delight as she settled the baby down from the surprise noise. We had so much fun as I responded to her cues and followed her lead! Who would have thought I would enjoy it as much as she did!

As my daughter began to develop relationships with her peers, we would have conversations about her playtime activities. We’d discuss how she felt when two of her friends had said they already have enough mommies, and that she should play the daddy instead. We then brainstormed ways by which she could still join in the play as a different character, such as a kitty or a puppy, since she was opposed to playing a male character. Through these conversations, I was able to help her develop her critical thinking skills as she gained valuable lessons in getting along well with others.

So play with your kids as much as you can. Talk to them and listen to what they have to say. Offer them opportunities to play with their peers as they develop their social skills even more.